This week there was an opinion piece in the New York Times (January 29, 2012) “Ritalin Gone Wrong” by Alan Sroufe, PhD. It set off a flurry of concerns between professionals and parents, pushing the hot-button topic of medicating children for ADHD. The very next day the New York Times ran a rebuttal point of view and my inbox held a response by Edward Hallowell, MD, a best-selling author on ADHD and an expert on attention deficit disorder.

Stepping aside from the long term value of medications, I found it interesting that they seemed to be agreeing that medication doesn’t “fix” having ADHD. No one I know believes that it does. Its purpose is to enable the brain of an ADHD person to “pause” long enough to control impulsive behavior. That pause makes it possible for them to make wise behavior choices, make good time management decisions, focus, and reach goals, IF they have some guidance.

When you blow away all of the smoke what you end up with is people talking about executive functions. I know from my work teaching the Sklar Process™, that some of my clients do indeed need medication. They find it very helpful, if not critical. However, in terms of truly changing behavior and thus their life, they need to be educated about their executive functions. They have to be taught specific external strategies along with the use of external tools to compensate for what their ADHD brain lacks. That is whole point of the Sklar Process™. It is honest help for students and adults who are struggling, especially those with ADHD. It doesn’t “fix” them either, but improved self-awareness and understanding brings about the hope for real improvement in their lives. Being able to help these folks, whether on medication or not, is one of the joys of my work.

What does losing weight have to do with executive functioning? Lots.

For me, executive functioning is all about understanding my brain’s needs so that I have maximum control over my time and productivity. I want time for both work and fun. Time for myself. Time for my family. Time for giving to the community.

To do all of that takes energy. Carrying around extra weight saps energy. I know. I have been overweight in my life. I also realize how hard it is to lose weight. It requires incredible metacognition to make the necessary choices to lose weight. What can you do? Learn more about your brain.

I recently brought home an interesting book, The Amen Solution. Dr. Amen is a psychiatrist whose passion is understanding the connection between the brain and behavior. His clinics have scanned more than 50,000 brains. He has found that our excess weight shows up in the pictures of our brains!  And, it turns out,  the brain of an overweight person is not a pretty picture to contemplate. Lose weight, and your brain gets healthier!

While not overweight at this point in my life, reading Amen’s book was a wake-up call. I have lots of plans for the rest of my life and I need a brain and body in maximum shape to be able to live those dreams. After reading Amen’s book I did “little” things like starting to measure the sugar I use (and consequently cutting back). I make sure my breakfast choices are eaten out of very small bowls. I record my weight every morning. I’m using metacognition to notice my portion sizes, choosing not to fill up my plate to overflowing or having seconds.

The result? Without any particular effort, beyond my usual exercise (CRITICAL!), little by little, I have lost 5 pounds over 3 months!

Amen has discovered that different brain types need to use different solutions to lose weight. Check out his book at the library or investigate his web site. He may just inspire you to improve your executive functioning by understanding the connection between your brain and your weight.

Planning is an executive functioning skill of the brain. It affects our ability to take the actions necessary for future planning. It also affects our ability to do complicated writing tasks such as a term paper.

I’m a real fan of paper and pencil for supporting the brain. It is often faster and simpler than technology tools. That said, I have fallen in love with Inspiration 9, a software program designed for visual thinking. Oh, my goodness—I’ve had such fun with the mind mapping and diagram tools. I’m using it to plan presentations, do long-term planning for my life and business, and also use it to coordinate and communicate with my growing staff of virtual assistants by combining it with dropbox. Since a picture is truly worth 1000 words it is a great tool.

When I made this mind map of what I do to run my business it became obvious that I needed to get some help!

So far I haven’t even touched the most amazing aspect of the program, its ability to turn a visual representation, a mind map or a mind web, into a linear word-based outline. It has tremendous potential to support those of us who struggle with writing. Designed originally as a classroom tool it would be terrific for educational therapists, tutors, and parents, who are helping students who struggle with writing. I gave a very brief demonstration of it to an 8th grade client whose eyes lit up as he saw the potential to help him with writing.

If you need some help with planning and writing, find inspiration in using inspiration 9. You can get a free month’s download at www.inspiration.com. It’s a great tool to improve executive functioning success.

Organizing is an executive function skill of the brain that many people struggle with. In the Sklar Process ™, I ask  a question, “What things do you keep misplacing?” Once that list is jotted down we talk about how everything, each object we own, each category of items, needs to have one specific predictable “home” where they belong so that you can readily find them.

We then do some problem solving, asking where would be each item’s most logical home. For example, my computer glasses belong in the case right next to my monitor. My purse always hangs on the back of a chair, just at the top of the stairs coming from the garage.

Of course you have to train yourself to “take it to its home” when you find an item in the wrong location. Doing that extra step requires building metacognition which will train you to keep up the pattern.  If I can do that, anyone can!

One student of mine decided that the top of his dresser would work for his keys, wallet, phone, itouch, etc. He asked his mom if he could draw an outline around each object so he could tell when it wasn’t in it’s home. That empty outline would remind him to take his phone out of his pocket, or go and get his keys that he left next to the back door. His mom graciously thought that was a great idea! If you didn’t want to paint on a furniture surface you could cut mat board, or something like it, to fit the top and draw outlines on that.

Having a home for items keeps you from being late looking for important objects. It can also be a great stress reducer. One of my Sklar Process ™ clients, shared the story about how in marriage counseling they’d solved a continuing battle between himself and his wife connected to the mail. His wife would pick it up and he could never find it. They agreed to one basket next to the door so he could find his mail on the way to work. Sometimes it’s the little things that destroy or save a marriage!

Improve your executive functioning skill of organization by creating a home for those constantly missing items. You’ll breathe easier.

My working memory is pretty awful. It is likely that a concussion on the playground way back in early elementary school is a big factor in this executive functioning deficit. Alas, what is truly scary is that my working memory is getting worse as I age, which is typical.

Sunday is my morning to complete a three-mile run. I repeat half-mile loops in my neighborhood. As I jog around my mind is very busy and suddenly I’m wondering if I’d done 1.5 miles, or 2 miles, or 2.5 miles? I’ve lost track! Using a counter doesn’t help because I don’t remember to click it.

Following the Sklar Process ™ First Truth of Time: Out of Sight, Out of Mind, I came up with a visual strategy to externally support my brain. I keep six coffee stirring sticks in  my pocket. As I round the corner on the hill where I slowdown, I drop a stick. The next turn around I see it on the ground and it reminds me to drop another one. I leave a visual marker to help me keep track of my laps.  I was inspired by Gretel, in the tale of Hansel and Gretel, who left a path of crumbs as a trail home. However, I learned from her mistake and don’t leave crumbs the birds will eat before I do my next half-mile.

I did five laps on this beautiful fall day.

If you have trouble with working memory and keeping track of repetitions, consider the this type of strategy. Give yourself a visual reminder to support your executive function of working memory.

When I work with people who struggle with executive functioning deficits, I am keenly aware of what they are asking of themselves. By working with me through the Sklar Process, they are taking a leap, a big leap of faith to even begin to hope that they can get better at handling their time, their commitments, the daily demands of life. It is huge for them to take the little steps to begin to change.

It is not easy to change. Change requires persistent use of metacognition (thinking about your thinking) to to be aware of your choices. You have to change your choices and habits. In essence, you have to change how you see yourself—who you are. That is a lot to ask of yourself.

Some people grapple with the issue of changing their self-identity. Others find the inner motivation more easily. This week I was so impressed with a 40′s something gentleman with ADHD.  He has returned to college to pursue a new career. He’s really working hard at practicing using the external tools I teach him in the Sklar Process. He is learning to support his brain to get things done in order to reach his personal goals. When I complimented him on his willingness to be so engaged in the process he said, “If not now, when?

I applaud his courage to not let his executive dysfunction stop him. Follow his lead and change your choices, support your brain to get things done. If not now, When?

Being a parent is hard work. Kids don’t come with directions. You bring home that little bundle of joy and you are off on a 24/7 job that lasts for years and years and years… If you have a child with a learning disability or executive functioning deficits or ADHD, it is really easy to get worn down and discouraged by your challenged and sometimes challenging child. How do you survive so that you can all thrive?

First, learn all you can about the issue your child faces. For example there are organizations dedicated to dyslexia, Tourette Syndrome, autism, and ADHD. For ADD/ADHD I recommend CHADD. They have a informative website and if you join the organization, CHADD members have access to many online support and educational programs. They also publish a useful magazine.

My second bit of advice is to get help. Scour your community for professionals and educators who can support you as you support your child. If there isn’t a support group, consider starting one. Remember too that you have to take care of yourself in order to help your child over the long haul.  You are in a marathon, not a sprint event.

My third piece of advice is to plan for some fun time with your child. If you feel like all you’re doing is nagging and fighting over homework and chores then it is definitely time to lighten things up. Stop focusing on the learning problems. Ask your child what they would like to do for fun and join them. No strings attached. You’re not allowed to say, “If you finish your homework then we’ll be able to…” Just go. Just have fun. That positive experience will give you renewed energy to do the harder parts of being a parent of a challenged child.

When I have angry exhausted parents at my table, their homework assignment for the week is to plan a “fun” event with their child and do it. When they report back the next week tension has dropped. So, if you need it, your assignment for the week is to have fun with your child. Leave a comment to share the results.

I can readily see the tempo of my life every morning when I sit down at my desk. If, like this morning, it is pretty messy, I have been pretty busy.  I have got to get a grip on these little piles before I start my day.

Paper management is a critical part of good time management skills.  In Seeing What I Need to Do, I teach the organizational principle that everything needs a home. So, as I look at the papers on my desk I will be filing them or scanning them, into their “home” files or binders.  One pile however has been getting taller and I’ve been confused as to where these pages belong. They are random sheets of information I want to keep because I keep referring back to them. However, I don’t want individual file folders for one piece of paper! It dawned on me this morning how to solve this dilemma. I’m going to create a file folder with the label “Cool Information.” I’m going to keep it in a slot on my desk organizer. Whew! I can clear up that pile and not lose the information. I’ll be able to remember that label and by keeping it on my desktop it won’t go out of sight and out of mind into a file cabinet. It will be easily accessible at my fingertips.

Take a look at your desk this morning and spend 10 minutes putting papers into their “home.” Use this time management tip and you’ll feel so much better.

Our demanding world requires us to do many things in a day. There was a time when time management strategies included getting good at multitasking—doing more than one thing simultaneously. Just think of your computer screen and how you are tempted to constantly check e-mails, respond to that “bling” of Skype, and check on “interesting” links in e-mails and Twitter. We do these things while we are “working.” Well, it’s not a good idea. Our brain doesn’t like to switch around. It does one thing at a time and when we change focus we dramatically increase the odds of errors in our work. In addition the work will actually take longer than if we hadn’t tried to multitask.

Two of my adult clients commented that they were now consciously stopping themselves from multitasking. One, who was compulsively checking her e-mails every few minutes, set a timer for 45 minutes. She told yourself that when the timer went off she could check her e-mails. She reported more focus and efficiency on her tasks. She wasn’t anxious about checking her e-mails. Another client said that her habit had been to set up a DVD movie or TV show on her computer while she folded laundry. She realized it takes a bit of time to set up the computer so she decided to forgo the movie and just focus on folding clothes. She reported how impressed she was with how quickly she folded four baskets of laundry. She realized that with the movie it would’ve taken her longer.

If you really want to improve time management—stop multitasking. Do one thing at a time. I’ll bet you will be impressed with the results.

One of the reasons I love my work helping individuals and families with executive functioning is that I am often  surprised and inspired by my client client’s responses to the prompts in their Seeing What I Need to Do—Course Notes. Sometimes I just sit back in my chair and say, “Wow! What great thinking. What great self-awareness.”

At the beginning of the last unit in the workbook I introduce the Third Truth of Time: The Way You Use Your Time Equals Your Life. I ask the question: “How do you want to remember your life?” In essence I’m asking clients to pause and write a bit of their own eulogy. This question tends to be really challenging for adolescents unaccustomed to thinking much beyond the now. So when I recently asked a 6th grader this question I was not surprised when he wrote down the word “fun.” What made my eyes open wide however was his second word: “hardworking.” This was followed by other impressive adjectives like “loving” and “forgiving.” I was so stunned I forgot to write them all down.

The reason I was so amazed is that I have never had anyone, adult or child, write down the word “hardworking.” This young man (with ADHD) had internalized the whole concept of being on the E-train in life. He had been engaged and putting energy and effort into his sport but now he’s doing the same for his schoolwork. Seeing What I Need to Do had given him the tools to support himself to be more successful with doing his homework independently. He was thrilled. His parents were delighted.

I’ve found myself thinking far beyond this student’s immediate present of doing his homework without complaining about it. This young man is obviously going places with his life because he isn’t afraid or resistant to the whole idea of working hard. It’s a tough demanding world in school and beyond. Fostering a work ethic is a critical life skill. I encourage everyone to support young people in developing goal directed persistence, a vital executive function.  Working hard leads to mastery and competency, the true foundations of self-esteem, self-confidence and success.